Bathroom Panic Attack- You will be Miserable until you Stop doing This

Intense fear, anxiety, and inadequacy wash over me and my eyes fill with tears….

I look in the bathroom mirror and know I’ve got to pull myself together and fast!

As humiliated as I am, discouraged about my progress, and frustrated with my results… leaving this room in tears will only make it worse.

Monday night I attended a Bikini Competition posing class with 12 seasoned, stage ready, fitness competitors waltzing around in bikinis at least 2% leaner than me

I arrived at the studio stressed about my readiness to compete. I am getting down to the wire with less than 18 days until the show…

The last 3 weeks have been tough! I am getting leaner but not as fast as I hoped…

At times my happiness with my body has been back on a roller coaster..

One minute I am thrilled to be slimmer than I have ever been in my entire life! I love getting dressed every morning and feeling the physical fitness of my body..

The next minute I am having mini panic attacks about being “ready” in time for this competition..

I am lean right now, but  competition lean is a whole different game.

As I stood in the bathroom staring at myself in the mirror and my months of mental conditioning and self love kicked in.

I looked myself in the eye and thought

“No one here knows my journey, no one here knows my real goals, no one here knows where I have come from..

No one here knows I am still breast feeding my 10 month old baby, no one knows I have lost over 70 pounds since he was born, no one knows the unique challenges I have kicked in the ass to be here in this body composition…

No one knows but me. And that is Enough! I AM ENOUGH”

I smiled at my beautiful bad ass self in the mirror, put my chin up proud and tall, and waltzed out of that bathroom like a freaking bikini competitor.

Comparing ourselves, our journey, and our results to anyone else is simply not fair. To them or us.

Every journey is unique. Every individual has different goals.

My goal for this competition is not to simply lean out and be competitive.

My goal is to do something I never thought possible, to get as lean and fit as I can while still breast feeding, to enjoy the journey, and to embody the confidence to own the best results I can get in the time I have…

Isn’t that what life is really all about?

Doing the very best we can with the time we have—

When we compare ourselves to others we discredit our effort. We dishonor ourselves…

We dig a hole of energetic deficit where we will truly never be enough.

There will always be someone leaner, richer, smarter, happier, and more successful. ALWAYS.

When we focus on using them as a measuring stick we can become so discouraged we give up… and that is the real tragedy.

Comparison is the thief of all joy. Stop robbing from yourself.

Stop using someone else’s measuring stick to determine your worth or success.

Live your Legacy



P.S. I talk in depth about two different ways we compare ourselves in my new book. Be sure to go snag your FREE copy! My Gift to you!


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